SURE A+
✔✔Forgiveness - ✔✔giving up the idea of a better past
✔✔What is forgiveness not? - ✔✔pardoning, forgetting, condoning, excusing and
reconciling
✔✔Getting stuck or the eddy's - ✔✔resentment- relational transgression, obsessing
over getting even
victimization- elicit sympathy, demand attention, induce guilt, excuse passivity
depression- focus on hurt, making a safe space
✔✔what are the steps to reconcile? - ✔✔agreement on violation, acknowledgment of
pain, apology for the hurt and pain caused
✔✔Reconciliation - ✔✔process of re establishing relationship, renewing trust, and
settling differences so that cooperation and a sense of harmony are restored
✔✔Elements of an apology - ✔✔-acknowledgment of harm without justification
-accepting responsibility
-expressing guilt/regret
-possible reparations
-proposed changes
-affirming shared values
-explanation if asked
✔✔Compelled apology - ✔✔when someone forced you to forgive the other person
✔✔3 part apology - ✔✔1. i am sorry
2. it was/is my fault
3. what can i do to make it right?
✔✔What is the most important aspect of forgiveness? - ✔✔acknowledging the truth of
the transgression
✔✔T or F Unlike giving forgiveness, receiving forgiveness is a simple task - ✔✔False
✔✔T or F Part of the process of forgiving someone is to face the anger you feel -
✔✔True
✔✔When Lisa says to her husband "you'd make a lousy father" she is communicating
which the of hurtful message? - ✔✔Evaluation
, ✔✔What is a characteristic of forgiveness? - ✔✔acknowledging the truth about what
has happened
✔✔which dimensions of interpersonal conflict is most relevant to the discussion of
offering and accepting forgiveness? - ✔✔expressed struggle
✔✔T or F Luckily , negotiation is similar in all cultures so once you've learned what is
negotiable in one culture, you'll be ready for other cultures - ✔✔False
✔✔What is not true about competitive bargainers? - ✔✔they will recognize and
enhance interdependence
✔✔What is a potential advantage of using adjudication to manage conflicts? - ✔✔power
imbalances may be corrected
✔✔As a third party, what goal do you need to understand well in order to help the
conflicting parties? - ✔✔Process
✔✔hurtful messages - ✔✔messages that criticize, tease, reject, or otherwise cause an
emotional injury to another
✔✔examples of hurtful messages - ✔✔-accusations
-evaluations
-orders/ commands
-advice
-statement of comparison
-disclosure of information
-judgment disguised as a question
-threat
-lie
✔✔ What are emotions? - ✔✔1) a felt physiological experience in the body
2)thinking and intepretation is based on our appraisal of what has happened
3)emotional expressions involving verbal & nonverbal
✔✔How are emotions most often expressed? - ✔✔non-verbal cues
✔✔What do emotions do in conflict? - ✔✔provide motivation,
can alert us to problems,
vary within the conflict,
some relationships become defined by emotional expressions