Assertive communication
Assertive communication involves:
• fairness
• directness
• tact and sensitivity
• Honesty
Using “I” statements
In assertive communication you show respect for the rights and feelings of others while
speaking up for your own rights, feelings and preferences
Passive communication
Passive communication involves:
• indirectness
• avoiding conflict
• being easily persuaded
• being a people pleaser
• hiding your true thoughts and feelings.
We choose passive communication when we consider the issue is trivial; when we are
fearful of losing the other person's respect or affection; or we have low self-esteem.
Aggressive communication
Aggressive communication involves:
• exerting control over others
• humiliating others
• dominating
• being pushy
• always needing to be right
• using absolute terms
blaming others.
Aggressive communicators want to be in control, are insecure, are afraid, don't value the
opinions of others or have unresolved anger.
How to communicate assertively
Convey your:
• perspective/perception of the situation –
'I've noticed that …‘ ‘When you …..”
• feelings about the situation –
'I'm annoyed when …'
• wants regarding the situation –
'I want us to work out an agreement
about sharing the housework …'
Assertive communication involves:
• fairness
• directness
• tact and sensitivity
• Honesty
Using “I” statements
In assertive communication you show respect for the rights and feelings of others while
speaking up for your own rights, feelings and preferences
Passive communication
Passive communication involves:
• indirectness
• avoiding conflict
• being easily persuaded
• being a people pleaser
• hiding your true thoughts and feelings.
We choose passive communication when we consider the issue is trivial; when we are
fearful of losing the other person's respect or affection; or we have low self-esteem.
Aggressive communication
Aggressive communication involves:
• exerting control over others
• humiliating others
• dominating
• being pushy
• always needing to be right
• using absolute terms
blaming others.
Aggressive communicators want to be in control, are insecure, are afraid, don't value the
opinions of others or have unresolved anger.
How to communicate assertively
Convey your:
• perspective/perception of the situation –
'I've noticed that …‘ ‘When you …..”
• feelings about the situation –
'I'm annoyed when …'
• wants regarding the situation –
'I want us to work out an agreement
about sharing the housework …'
