Philosophy 325
Dr. Sher
04/11/2018
Love, Idealization and Sexual Equality
Shulamith Firestone wrote The Dialectic of Sex in 1970 when society in the US was still
experiencing male domination, with most women uneducated and without careers. The lack of
women in the workforce was a prominent example, within the umbrella of male-dominating
components, that I believe she felt, contributed to men’s inability to love in the way women can.
This is because women depended on men so heavily in their lives due to having no financial
means to support themselves or their children. Even if they could work, they often had little to no
experience or education. Men were seen as people, and women, a sub-people; they were men’s
shadows, and hardly ever at the forefront of any important position in life. However, as I do
agree with Firestone to the extent that men do not possess the potential to genuinely love, I don’t
think it is due to the building blocks of our culture – instead, it is the biological nature of men. It
should not only be considered the primary answer to our question, but it should also be the
reason we cut our fellow sex a break, for they simply cannot change who they innately are.
Regarding love and how it operates in our society, Firestone outlined many issues that
men and women faced. Gender inequality, she believed, was a cultural construct which kept
women oppressed and gave men almost all the freedoms and opportunities within society.
Because of this, men and women struggled when attempting to love each other. According to
her, men need love and support from women to maintain stability in their lives but are not
capable of reciprocating it. Initially, men tend to strongly idealize their partner and set
expectations they cannot live up to. This makes it not only difficult for women to process, but
their emotional life becomes dreadful. Women overtime feel and become inferior to men,
become financially dependent on them and will constantly try to gain their approval. While
romantic love should be a mutual feeling, to Firestone, it was not possible at the time because it
was just a cultural tool that oppressed women. She believed that women add little to culture and
that men play the main roles that contribute to it.
Firestone argues that men can’t genuinely love the way women can – they can’t commit
and idealize women in a way they can’t live up to. While I agree with her idea that men don’t
love the way women do, I disagree with her explanation of why this is the case. While most men
1
Dr. Sher
04/11/2018
Love, Idealization and Sexual Equality
Shulamith Firestone wrote The Dialectic of Sex in 1970 when society in the US was still
experiencing male domination, with most women uneducated and without careers. The lack of
women in the workforce was a prominent example, within the umbrella of male-dominating
components, that I believe she felt, contributed to men’s inability to love in the way women can.
This is because women depended on men so heavily in their lives due to having no financial
means to support themselves or their children. Even if they could work, they often had little to no
experience or education. Men were seen as people, and women, a sub-people; they were men’s
shadows, and hardly ever at the forefront of any important position in life. However, as I do
agree with Firestone to the extent that men do not possess the potential to genuinely love, I don’t
think it is due to the building blocks of our culture – instead, it is the biological nature of men. It
should not only be considered the primary answer to our question, but it should also be the
reason we cut our fellow sex a break, for they simply cannot change who they innately are.
Regarding love and how it operates in our society, Firestone outlined many issues that
men and women faced. Gender inequality, she believed, was a cultural construct which kept
women oppressed and gave men almost all the freedoms and opportunities within society.
Because of this, men and women struggled when attempting to love each other. According to
her, men need love and support from women to maintain stability in their lives but are not
capable of reciprocating it. Initially, men tend to strongly idealize their partner and set
expectations they cannot live up to. This makes it not only difficult for women to process, but
their emotional life becomes dreadful. Women overtime feel and become inferior to men,
become financially dependent on them and will constantly try to gain their approval. While
romantic love should be a mutual feeling, to Firestone, it was not possible at the time because it
was just a cultural tool that oppressed women. She believed that women add little to culture and
that men play the main roles that contribute to it.
Firestone argues that men can’t genuinely love the way women can – they can’t commit
and idealize women in a way they can’t live up to. While I agree with her idea that men don’t
love the way women do, I disagree with her explanation of why this is the case. While most men
1
