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1. Cognition refers to...: thought processes partners have in their relationships
2. What are schemas?: "thought maps"
Our brain establishes links between connected topics, making it easier to move from one to
the other
3. Schemas result in...: certain positive or negative thoughts being associated with our
partner or relationships in general
4. What are attributions?: Assumptions we make about others
We attribute certain reasons for other people's behaviors (ex. "She did that because she was
tired.")
5. What plays a large role in the success or failure of relationships?: Attributions
6. Distressed couples and attributions:: Use more attributions than non distressed
couples
Attributions are more negative
Attribute partner's negative behavior to who they are (internal factors) Expectations
are more negative
7. Non distressed couples and attributions:: Attributions are more positive
Attribute partner's positive behavior to who they are (internal factors)
8. What is affect?: Someone's general mood state
(Are they generally positive or negative? Reserved or outgoing?)
9. What does emotion refer to?: Someone experiencing a specific emotion or
emotional blend
(Angry, sad, happy, afraid, etc.)
10. Emotions that do not seem to be problematic in marriages:: anger
11. Emotions that tend to be problematic in marriages:: high-intensity emotions such as
contempt or disgust
12. What are behaviors?: Things people do in relationships Are
highly predictive of relationship success
13. What is behavior driven by?: A cognition-emotion cycle
14. Escalation vs. De-escalation: things go faster (fights and emotions)
15. Reciprocity: trading
16. Affection: good
17. Repair attempts: in the moment try to figure it out/keep things positive
18. Bids & turns: currency in relationship bank; never get bids back = negative
outcome
19. Pursue/withdraw: one raises issue other does not
20. 5:1 ratio of behaviors: 5 positive: 1 negative
, 21. Active listening: understanding and repeating it back